Last month during a discussion on View from the Right about the federal government’s attempt to block private businesses from conducting criminal background checks on prospective employees because of disparate impact, reader Paul offered an excellent neologism that Auster highlighted in its own post:
If we are to be truly egalitarian, we need to stop using the word “criminal,” which stigmatizes those who, through no fault of their own, are forced to define their own concept of existence and to support themselves by operating outside the constructed “rules” of society—rules which, traditionally at least, have largely rationalized existing power relations while having a disparate impact on the powerless. Instead of “criminal,” I propose “alternative life strategist,” or “altstrat.” This could also be used as a verb, as in, “Quantavius altstrated my car.” (Though in that case, “redistributed my car” would also do).
Such prompted another Paul to make an apt reference to Annie Hall:
Paul T. is on to something. I have long suspected that we will see a move to legalize crimes that are committed by the most oppressed of minorities. The rationale would be something like that advanced by Alvy Singer’s father in Annie Hall, when he berates his wife for firing the house cleaner for stealing. He shouts, “She’s a colored woman, from Harlem! She has no money! She’s got a right to steal from us! After all, who is she gonna steal from if not us?”
I heard someone suggest new politically correct terms for crimes to remove their stigma; for example, robbery could be renamed “affirmative acquisition” and rape renamed “affirmative affection.”
As for neologisms, my most useful contribution to the English language so far has probably been the verb, “mormon,” as I mentioned in “Questionable Misogyny”:
I have a tendency quite opposite to that of Mormons when it comes to external relations in the realm of beliefs and ideas. Mormons seem to be bred or well trained to appear similar to whatever you espouse. They regularly exhibit an image quite akin to whatever you say so that you come to see their religion as recognizably familiar to your own. I have even coined the verb, “to mormon” someone, which means to trick others into thinking that one is similar to them when one is quite different. Perhaps, Mormons developed this behavior as a survival mechanism, which then became useful as a missionary tool. Besides a smile, a well-groomed Mormon kid’s chief artillery consists in, “We, too.” That is how the children of Lehi reel in the wary, and then they keep them in the tent with healthy family and community lifestyles: L.D.S. Strategy 101.
Spread its usage far and wide.
On View from the Right’s post last week about the ongoing Zimmerman saga, “Zimmerman had facial injuries, and the FBI is thinking of charging him with hate crime. Not a non sequitur!,” Patrick H. comments:
I have come to see the error of my ways. To repent, I would like to form white flash mobs which, in solidarity with black flash mobs, will attack other white people. This way, blacks will not have to place themselves in danger of physical harm (if one of the racists fights back) or arrest by our racist criminal justice system. The real question is why and how white America has let the black need for racial justice (expressed through “direct action” in the form of flash mobs) go unfulfilled. White indifference has caused flash mobs. This indifference has, in turn, caused black people to do something they should never have to do — which is anything at all. I’m tired of seeing blacks put themselves in jeopardy because of white laziness and indifference. Blacks should not have to beat up whites. Whites should do it for them. This way black youth will be freed up to do much needed work in theoretical physics, continental philosophy, and the blues.
The gems that one finds when one mines the absurd . . .
Kristus vstal z mrtvých!
The Hollywood Reporter recently published an interview with Lady Ann, wherein Coulter notes the obvious—that Law & Order and similar trash reveal the fevered imagination of leftist Tinseltown: “Hollywood & Politics: Ann Coulter on Why America Hates Hollywood.”
Southerners are dumb hicks, presumptively Klanners. Residents of small towns are narrow-minded xenophobes, presumptively Klanners. Christians are hypocrites and anti-everything (even dancing!), presumptively Klanners. Businessmen are cheating, soulless vermin, presumptively Klanners (unless they are in a Hollywood-approved business like making solar panels). And Connecticut WASPs are dull, sexually neurotic snobs who beat their wives and molest their daughters. Presumptively Klanners.
Hollywood’s heroes are just as odd. Moviegoers flocked to a film about a prostitute who was not only gorgeous and charming but disease-free because they wanted to see a Cinderella story. We know Pretty Woman‘s winsome streetwalker was as plausible as a talking bear, except we’ve always wanted to see a talking bear. . . .
Out in America, the country is fairly bristling with crosses and American flags, but in the Hollywood oeuvre, those symbols appear rarely, and when they do, they generally show up as signifiers of White Supremacists or child-molesting Connecticut WASPs. In real life, there are a lot more girls wearing cross necklaces than teenagers with Che Guevara posters in their rooms, a peculiar staple of Hollywood movies.
In the remake of Cape Fear, the psychotic killer, Max Cady, was recast as a Christian fundamentalist, sporting biblical tattoos and constantly reeling off scriptural verses. Other than the raping and murdering part, the person in real life he most resembles is Tim Tebow.
Is that what Hollywood thinks of Tebow? And why is there never a character like Tebow in any movie or TV show? Never, ever, ever. . . .
Let me give you the plots of two true crime episodes I recently watched, back-to-back, on ID TV. The show was titled Unusual Suspects—“unusual” only if it were a Hollywood production. In the first, a woman was raped at home, stabbed through the heart and her house set on fire. The police looked at suspicious white guys in her life. Then, in the last five minutes of the show, DNA proved that her rapist/murderer was a Hispanic who wanted to have sex with a virgin. In the second, a married couple and their son were stabbed to death in their sleep. Various white guys were arrested, but all were let go when their DNA didn’t match or they had airtight alibis. Then it turned out to be a random Hispanic kid who committed the murders as a gang initiation.
In other words, the exact opposite of a Law & Order plot. I like watching beautiful rich people with fabulous Manhattan apartments killing one another as much as anyone. Maybe more. But why do ALL the wealthy white people, Christians, Southerners or WASPS in these scripts have to be racist, misogynist snobs? Whatever happened to diversity? Hollywood learned to stop stereotyping black characters. Can’t it learn to stop stereotyping the rest of America?
Writer Ben Shapiro has an interview with John Langley of Cops in his book Primetime Propaganda. Langley takes offense that critics accuse Cops of perpetuating stereotypes, whereas Langley admits that he intentionally has the show cover more white criminals than black or hispanic criminals because he does not wish to confirm the public’s opinions on the “color of crime”—which happen to be based on facts rather than leftwing fancies.
Coulter’s examples, Shapiro’s book, and Bernand Goldberg‘s work list a small fraction of examples of Hollywood’s leftwing ideology—a rather target rich environment. Yet, your typical shopper at Trader Joe’s refuses to see it. Such a man still feels shame when he see decades old movies’ portraying terrorists as Mohammedans or drug cartels as hispanics—you know, the groups statistically overrepresented in such real world activities. For leftist consumers of pop culture, the silver screen is always one accurate portrayal away from The Birth of a Nation.